10 Easy tips (you can do TODAY) that could change someone’s world

Hi all,

WARNING! 

Getting all deep and full of feelings and stuff, SO brace yourself! 

Still not listening, fine, but I warned you. 

Maybe it is the holidays that's approaching. But with 2016 only 24 days away, you start to rethink 2015.  Have you done the things you really loved this year? Do the people around you know you love them? What are the things that really matter? What are the most important things the people around you can do? It doesn’t matter how big or small; how significant to you or insignificant to others.

(With all these questions this blog can actually be a 5 part squeal.) 

I made cookies, as guest favours, for my Aunt’s surprise birthday party the previous weekend. This led me to think about all the things we do for other people. The effort and time we put in, whether it is a gift or a party.

One of my colleagues asked me the other day; “Do you ever wonder if other people will do the same for you? The effort and time that we put in to make things special, when it is time to return the favour, do you think they will do the same for us?”

Chances are that they won’t and you would end up hurt, angry and even frustrated with the people around you as they would not always do the same for you as you do for them. You start to plot some form of revenge as you are disappointed in their efforts and the time they invested.

Now, the life lesson I have learnt; “Do to others what you would like them to do to you.”(Without expecting them to live by the same rules) If you follow the above quote and you really take it to heart, then whether or not the favour is returned, is irrelevant.

It means that you are doing it with the right mind-set, not for what you can get out, but what you put in, and what it would mean to them. Do we have any other choice? My Mamma, Julie (a very wise woman, you will get to know her as my posts increase), use to spot the situation where I was mad or frustrated, and she would say in a very irritated tone “there are more than enough mean people in the world, you do not need to be one of them, do the things that make you feel good, and not because you wish to get something back”. (This is not easy, and I still remind myself of this when I am in a similar situation) 

Sometimes you need to be the bigger person as you never know what battle the person next to is fighting. (Another Julie quote) Something small or insignificant to you could mean the world to someone else.

10 Easy tips (you can do TODAY) that could change someone’s world

• If you see someones mood is down, tell them a joke, if they don’t laugh, walk away and tell them that you will come back with a new and improved version. Make sure to check up on them later, even if it is just a text.
• Thank people who serve you—waiter, receptionist, cleaner, security guard
• Pay for someone’s groceries in your cue, if you don’t have a lot of money, stand in the short cue in the front of the shop (e.g. Max 5 items row), or pick someone that you can see struggles by counting all their coins.
• Call and invite an old friend to get drinks, take a small gift with, even if it’s only a Christmas chocolate.

• Stop by the hospital to visit a friend, if you can’t stop by, make an effort to stop at their home afterwards with something, or at the very least send a message a few days later finding out how they are doing.
• Plan a meeting, surprising everyone with a tea party (remember the cake)
• Pay the toll for the person behind you.
• Call a friend going through a difficult period to show your support, maybe arrange a “single at last” party, or buy a “happy divorce" cake, with proper chick flicks. (only if it is that kind of “difficult situation”, otherwise it might just be awkward)
• Next time you are at the shops, buy something (no matter how small) for the special person in your life, or write a letter or note to them. 
• Invite a friend for dinner, try to make their favourite food. Remember to talk less and listen more. 

BONUS: If you receive good service from someone, make sure to go to their manager and pass on the compliment. People are easy to complain but very slow to compliment.

Make time for the small things in life, and make sure to think about the people around you and what they might me going through. Do something for your sweetheart or stranger, maybe they pass it on to the next stranger.

That’s it for another blog post., hope you are making the most of what is left of 2015.

Please make sure to subscribe in the block below, and pass a comment if you enjoyed what you read!

Love,

5 Reasons why the friends you keep are responsible for your success

Follow up with friends

Hi all,

So I did my first blog entry this week, quite nerve wreaking when you think you write something, and putting it out there for the whole world to see.

For those of you who have read it, thanks, and thanks for bearing with the mistakes. I saw a few of them this morning, which I fixed. It is a learning curve for me, but truly exciting. I think I might be addicted!

Well, at least it is a good kind of addiction. But you become addicted to the things that make you feel good. I have come to believe that that is the key of life. Surround yourself with things that make you feel good, things that make you happy, things that inspire you.

Well my positive addiction, (besides debating and playing devil’s advocate, which may not always be positive I might add) is surrounding myself with positive people. I have the best, ‘full of life’ friends, people that understand my argumentative personality. My best friend that turned into my husband, I have colleagues that have turned in to friends, but most important, I only have a hand full of good friends. I have realised early in life that it is about the quality of the people that surround you, not the quantity.

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Is a quote by Jim Rohn, and words that I have seen come to life as life throws his curve balls and categorise your friends into the ones you need to keep and the ones you need to let go. Your friends influence your life immensely, whether it is your life spiritually, financially or physically. Now this brings me to, how these people influence your life.

 5 Reasons why the friends you keep are responsible for your success:

1. They are the driving force behind your motivation.

Whether it is intentional or not, people look at their friends and feel envious of what they have or where they have been or what they do. Whether they motivate you by creating a; “I wish I could also earn that salary” statement or whether it is “I never want to have that worries” statement, they plant the seed that make you want put the effort in to the daily things you do.

2. Good friend will keep you positive

When you are in a bad mood, or had a bad day, they will be the ones trying to lift your spirits. Making funny jokes, helping you find a solution or just keeping you company when you are stuck in a rut.

3. Friends create a sense of belonging

You feel at home when you are with them. You are comfortable in your own skin around them and that creates increased self-worth. Psychological Bulletin found that positivity is linked to positive perception of yourself and others. It increases performance, your creativity and problem solving and overall success.

4. People skills

People teach you about people. As in my previous entry, 10 Reasons why you must test your personality, I wrote about the importance of knowing yourself but also others. The personality test is the theory, the friends you make and the friends you keep around is a daily practice of those skills. You learn how to react to situations and to the different people in their very different environments. This creates success as people don’t manage a business, they manage people.

5. They keep you sane.

They might sometimes drive you insane, but a shoulder to cry on or a gym buddy to vent to, or even a cocktail buddy to help you drown your sorrows will help you face another day.

Surround yourself with people that make you want to better yourself (they have to be people you like, don’t waste time on people that don’t share your groove)

Thank the good friends around you for the positive influence they have on your life. The bad friends you ask? Thank them to, as they have also created who you are. If you are not happy with whom you have become, change to the authentic you. Then surround yourself with friends that keep you positive. Friends that are such a good influence on your life, that you become addicted to their presence.  

“Associate only with positive, focused people who you can learn from and who will not drain your valuable energy with uninspiring attitudes. By developing relationships with those committed to constant improvement and the pursuit of the best that life has to offer, you will have plenty of company on your path to the top of whatever mountain you seek to climb.” – Robin Sharma

Ps. I have new exciting ventures and blog posts coming soon, so please subscribe to my blog below. It’s free.

Love,

An intro to me and my personality

Welcome to All Zesty,

Thanks for taking the time to read my first blog entry. 

Now let me start by giving you background on myself and how I came to writing this entry.

I am a lecturer in Event management. I studied communication studies (which I loved), started working in events after Varsity and decided to combine both when I got a job as a lecturer.

I have contemplated for several months on what I can do to keep my inner self satisfied. And yet another day at the office, trying to do 100 things at the same time, I thought to myself, “Myself, what can you do to better yourself? What would best suite your personality? What type of personality is that that you have?”

So, did a quick Google search, did a random personality test on www.16personalities.com and BAMMM. I found out that my personality type is ENTP, now for you that don’t know what it means; it stands for, Extraverted iNtuitive Thinking Perceiving (ENTP). I know that’s a mouth full. I had to Google it myself.

Now being an ENTP personality type that basically means I am analytical person.  I love talking, debating, and playing devil’s advocate, and to argue just for the sake of it. I am so busy analysing information, and juggling ideas and I sometimes lose the plot and leave it all together. Best way to talk to an ENTP is to be straightforward and don’t cut corners. www.humanmetrics.com/personality/entp.

They were spot on. Suddenly I was at 250 words in at 3.36 minutes, writing a blog that I struggled to get going for nearly 3 months. I never knew what writers block was, then again, I never saw myself as a writer. Shows you what a little inspiration can do.

As you read on you will realise that I have so much crap going on in my head that it is hard to concentrate on one thing at a time. And with that I don’t mean I multi task, because I forget whatever I was busy doing, starting to contemplate on the next worldly problem, I know that contemplating what I am going to eat for dinner doesn’t count as a ‘worldly problem’, but I do feel like a contender on MasterChef, when I have 1 hour to cook dinner with limited resources and 3 judges who will be waiting for their plates by 19:00 sharply. My plates never quite look (or tastes) like theirs though. I do think it would be interesting to participate in something like that, (but that is for another entry)

So now that I have introduced myself, and my fellow ENTP personalities will relate when I say it, I have struggled, had to show serious self-restraint to try and keep myself on track as my mind have wondered at least 10 + times with additional information. I am actually sitting with a piece of paper next to me, writing all the ideas down so that I don’t forget them while thinking of the next idea.

That aside, finding out what personality type I am, made me think, if I struggle to understand myself (and I have been living with me for 25 years), how important is it for you to try and understand other people? It is important to try and listen more and talk less, listen with the sole purpose of understanding, not replying.

Here are 10 advantages of knowing your personality type and that of the people around you:

1. You learn about yourself, and why you react the way you do.
2. You learn about the people around you and how they will react and how you will react towards them
3. You learn how to communicate with fellow colleagues, friends, family and even strangers
4. You can identify where your comfort zone is and what you need to do to challenge yourself to get out for your comfort zone.
5. You learn what career paths would best suite your personality and why.
6. You improve on your problem-solving ability as you have more information about yourself and the people around you and how everyone will react and review the situation.
7.  It helps you identify your strengths.
8.  It showcases your weaknesses and where you need to improve.
9. Makes you a better leader or team player, as you can identify others strengths and weaknesses.
10. You learn how to be content with yourself and your personality

So go check out your personality, let me know what interesting things you’ve learnt about yourself or others, and make a true effort to try and understand other people, and why they do the things they do. www.16personalities.com/

Welcome to my journey to understanding myself, hope you find your reason to sparkle.

Love,