“I promise to love you, even when I hate you”

Hi,

So, I know you are thinking… “Hey... How is there a new blog already?? She only posted, like once a month or something.” But like I said in my previous blog, I am going to change that! My blogs might be a bit shorter, but they will be more and who knows, maybe your lazy bones might actually read through the whole thing.

In the middle of February all you see is red and pink, hearts and sweet words and rhymes. So whether you have already found your love or are still searching, life is too short to waste it on people that are not worth your time, or on food that doesn’t taste good! Keep the fire inside ignited and follow your dreams.

I have been married for over 2 years now, but we are celebrating 10 years together this year. I am not an expert on the “Love” subject at all but I have a bit of experience. So with that said I thought I might write something for Valentine’s Day. Cheesy I know, I know, but I am a hopeless romantic. So today’s blog is about:

How to love your significant other, even if you don’t like them…….. at that particular moment.

1. Don’t understand, just love.

Before we got married my mom gave my husband a bit of advice; “Don’t try and understand her, just love her” I think my mom might not have realised that the advice was applicable to me as well.

You cannot always understand why the other person does the things they do, but it is not always your place to know. Every now and then you need to close your eyes and just trust!

2. Remember why you love him/her so dearly even when you do fight.

One day I asked my students: “Give me an example of the best words that someone has ever said to you”. One guy replied and said; “Ma'am, the best words is when your High School crush says; “Hi”. That struck a chord with me. It is the best feeling, to be in love and trusting that person with your whole heart. That is what happens when you first fall in love. You allow yourself to be vulnerable and you allow that person to sweep you off your feet. Remember that amazing feeling and what it means to truly be in love.

3. Take a “time out” from fighting.

This is not easy and I am still learning and practicing this today, and will probably in future. Take a pause, breathe and stop the fight before it gets too heavy! When things aren’t going the way they were supposed to, you might say something you are going to regret later. Taking “a pause” gives both parties the chance to cool off and regain perspective.

4. Be spontaneous.

This is hard when you have been together for a really long time. The only reason the passion runs dry is because we don’t put the same effort and attention into our relationships that we did in the first few months. We get lazy and think, “Well he knows I love him”, until he doesn’t.

So my advice, even if you are going to be home and have nothing planned, spend time together. Do a dinner for two on the carpet in your living room. Watch a movie together and buy his favourite chocolate, or write a note “I promise to love you, even when I hate you”

Ps. Never go to sleep angry. Say you are sorry, ESPECIALLY THE LADIES. And always give a kiss good night!

Love,

6 Steps to success and less stress!

Sooooo, just need to catch my breath for a second! This is the first time in a really long time that I managed to go to the gym, be home early, start dinner and still have time to lie down on the couch and open my computer for something other than work.

Classes started, personal life was a bit hectic but nothing we can’t handle. With that said this blog entry kept me on my toes as I am starting a new blog entry after writing the previous one all the way to 700 words and decided; “Nahh I am not feeling it”. Yes yes I know I need to get the writing thing under control and start speeding things up. I get a lot of comments that I am not pushing out content fast enough, I promise I will try my best. For now this will have to do.

So, in my previous blog I spoke about procrastination and I think that it is one of my worst qualities. One of my best qualities I believe, is being ambitious and having a constant drive to better myself and my situation. Yes I do believe that I sometimes take things too far. It was exactly this thought that made me think, “When is enough, enough. When do you stop thinking about the future? When do you stop being ambitious?”

Conclusion?  You never do. You never stop thinking about tomorrow and wanting to better yourself. You should never stop chasing your own personal form of success. You should never stop trying to be successful. There are so few people who actually reaches the “Self-actualization stage” of Maslow’s hierarchy. Well I am one of those ambitious people who think that I can make it to that stage.  I believe that the day you stop learning and stop growing is the day you stagnate and your whole “being” starts to fade.

So before this happens to you, here are 6 steps to ensure that you keep your eye on the prize.

6 Steps to success!

1. Start a new project.

Do something you love for the love of it, not the money. You know you are in the right place if you would rather be doing what you are doing for free, than not at all. Your passion might just be contagious and in process you start a new business venture. You will be willing to put the hours in to make it work. So start an online course, something creative or maybe a new sport. Just do something that takes you out of you comfort zone.

2. Start aiming for extraordinary not ordinary

“The greater danger most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short: but in setting our aim to low, achieving our mark” This is something I tell my students on a daily basis. You need to aim for a 100% mark. There is no glory in aiming for 50% and receiving 40% but if you aim for 100% the chances are that you will achieve 80%.

3. Set a goal for yourself.

Life is just made up of thousands for small goals. Whether you want to participate in a 10km run this year, learn how to make 2 new dishes for dinner or improve you relationships with friends or colleagues. Set a goal for the next month. Make sure your goal is SMART, (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relative, and Time-bound).

4. Make it permanent

Write it down, tell it to someone and stick it somewhere you will see it on a daily basis. My cupboard has four A4 pages inside and I need to open it every single day before I can get ready for work and before I can get in to bed in the evenings. It is a constant reminder of where you are heading.

5. Act as if you already have it

I am not saying spend R2 Mill because you aimed that you will be winning the Lotto. Remember the SMART guidelines. I am saying, before you go to bed you tell yourself “There is no need to worry about money as I already have more that I can spend” Before you know it you will receive that what you already imagined to be true.

6. Be thankful

This is the most important bullet for me. This makes the difference between being “arrogant, always wanting more and never being satisfied with anything” to “anything that you receive from this point on would be a blessing in your life”. Maybe you could alco be thankful for the people in your life and make a difference in their lives. Have you noticed that the day you are in a good mood everything else seems to be going right but the day you are in bad mood or in a hurry everything seems to be going wrong?

“Most places in life are continuously telling you that your dreams aren’t possible or practical. You don’t want to hear that when you are under the age of 30, what you want to do is race after them.” Steve Jobs

Whether you are under the age of 30, or you can still remember that stage, it is important to be young at heart and follow the fire that is ignited every time you think about making a change in your life. Thank the people in your life for what they have done, and aim for greatness. 

 As I am starting to doubt my life and everything I do, my amazing husband leans over and shows me the following quote; “Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and start being excited about what could go right”

Love,